Whaddup??!!

Hey peeps. It's been a long time since I last updated this thing. So yeah. Here I am again. It's MYE fever now. Pheww. Can die already. But I don't want to talk about it anymore. Whatever comes, I'll just accept it.

Honestly speaking, I miss the times I'm being forced to be confronted, forced to be talking about things I don't like to talk about, forced to be listened throughout. Why? I felt so insecure this days. I just have so much to catch up. It's such a big jump. I sometimes felt so pressurized that one day, I broke down and cried. I really don't know what to do. I felt really insecure. I don't have anything to hold on to. I don't really have anyone to hold on tightly to. When people gives me random hugs, it just gave me that sense of longing and appreciated. And sometimes, that hug too gave me that motivation. To just live on. People may say that want to die earlier and that's what had been in my mind for a long time. But to think again of all the people who made you live your life, who existed in your life, who you actually cared about just pulls you back and continue till your final destination. My point here is, I just need some love and care. Right here, right now, no matter what it costs me, no matter how. With this. I end my entry for today.


Signing off,
Hayashi.

Whaddup ?!

Hey peeps. It's me once more. Yeah. Exam fever is back once more. For once, I never felt this much of pressure. Why? Because those damned SYF is in 2 months! Well, we realy can't do much. But what I know is we seriously need to buck up.

 I have something to share. This days I felt empty. And by empty, I meant very empty.I don't know why.


Recently, I accidentally my friend's notes. I know she write beautiful things. And I decided to read more. But what I read, it actually sets me to tears. I never knew she appreciated me so much. How she would rather help me. She wrote about me saving her. Thinking of it now makes me wanna cry. I don't know why. The way she wrote about love, life and all, she really moved me. She makes me realize how important I am, to her.

Because of her, I felt that I am finally somebody. All this while, I thought I was a nobody. Now, I'm going to make her feel that she's a somebody to me. I'm going to make her feel that she's no more a nobody to any body. To those out there, you just got to realize. You are as important as a king to the kingdom. Without you, nobody is somebody. I know that you completed somebody.




Signing off,
Hirotake Hayashi

Whaddup ?!

Know what? I am still so impressed with him. It's almost three years now.

The first time he came in, he came in smiling. When he came to work, he came smiling. When he's going home, he went home smiling.

He smiles when he helps me. He smiles when I'd blown my top. He smiles even though I scolded him.

People can't resist it but to smile every time he does to others. He tried his best to make me smile when I am not.   He tried some more when I am already am smiling. When asked why, he said, "You're not smiling sincerely."

Impressive. That was my first thought.

But then, I am just so curios. He is just so worried about others. But sometimes I wonder, how about him?

He troubled himself so much just to help me.

I never knew how to repay him.

Even yesterday(15 February) when I was so fed up and had been so rude to him, he simply laughed.

He left me wondering. Why?

Why had he laughed?

Why does he find it so funny?

Why had he considered it as an entertainment for himself?

Why? And why exactly he left me wondering alone?

He loves games. Especially mind games. I don't understand. He will just leave you there all so puzzled. Wondering all alone.

But the thing that he does that never fails to move and touch others' hearts is when he smiles.

His smile just seems to melt and warm others' hearts.

His smile lits up the world in others. Even though his smile is just a candlelight lit, it still counts. It's people like him who make people's day. People like him contributes to others' life. People like him fulfills one's dream. People like him fulfills one's need.



Signing off,

Hirotake Hayashi

Whaddup ?!

Hey peeps. Been a long long time since I last update this thing. Well, my life hasn't change as much. But my lifestyle did. Oh man. Suck. SUCK I TELL YOU. Sometimes, I got so pissed off at the smallest little things. Especially this days. I got so pissed off so easily that people got pissed of with ME. What the heck. Well. What to do. Hey. Know what? Probably they will re-elect a new President. YEAH MAN! And plus. I got new band fetish. Guess who? Old boys WESTLIFE!!!!! Yeah that's right. Loving them man. :D Life is short people. I got so many problems. But I kept everything away. But I remembered what Mr Kamal said: "You can keep on letting people punching your face and forget  about it. But will you? What will you do if people punch your face?" 

I still remember my answer to that question:  "I will punch back of course!" Tearing. Tears are dropping, I tell you. He told me something that really is so meaningful: "Yeah, you can punch back. But wouldn't that be harsh? Your solving a problem by making another problem. And you have another option you chose not to choose. You can turn around and lock them person up and warn them not to punch you. Which simply means you solve that problem by really solving. You take small little steps,though it's very hard for you. "

I teared more. I never knew why. But serious shits, he spoiled me rotten. But thanks to him. I am the person I am now. Not all changed. But slightly better. Slightly loved. Thanks to him, everybody's world is a little bit more better. Though it's not much. It still is better.

Signing off

Hayashi

P/S : Smile. People, smile. :)       

Whaddup ?!



Yo peeps!! I am back from days of silence.. I am just plain bored here okay? And .. oh yeah!  Its raining! Look!! Okay .. what ever .. hehe ... i will tell why i love the rain so much.. And wow! I am still crazy over Remy Ishak!!! Rudolf Schenker too!! I am adding a new one, AVANTASIA'S TOBIAS SAMMET!! Woots!! I LOVE REMY ISHAK AND RUDOLF SCHENKER AND TOBIAS SAMMET!! Okay.. i am just overreacting here... what ever... i miss Kapoku lots lots... i got no guitar to strum already... :( .... its okay!! but then, my composing will slow down too.. haix.. what to do? Here's who:

Rain On Me !!

Remy Ishak

Rudolf Schenker

Tobias Sammet




















And most IMPORTANT of all......

Nisa Schenker Andika!!
@
Hirotake Hayashi!!
@
Nazuma Himahara!!

:p












Signing off,
Hayashi

Whaddup ?!




Hey people!!!Its been a long time since I update this blog.Yeah..Very lazy...Congratz to me for composing 4 songs altogether!*around of applause* HAHAHA.. And this is what you call self-praise --'  ..Hehe..YUP!! I AM GOOD! First is "Why Are They Killing Me" , next, "Wishes" ,followed by my first complete Malay song,"Inspirasi Hidupku" which means "The Inspiration Of My Life" and my currently last one,"Bring Us To Fantasy".. Both new ones are inspirated by my dear Remy who really set me thinking.Thanks wherever you are.

But I am seriously not congratulating myself for being the Chairman of Drama Club.Like WTF?? Its only my first day and when Ms Tan told us to brainstorm,I DIDN;T GET THE CHANCE TO SPEAK!!!! Shit or what? No idea..... haixx.. what to do.. I have got problems at home but who am i going to talk to? Ms Jacq? Mr Joseph? Mr Kamal?

I got no problems talking to Ms Jacq but she is no more in the cabin and she herself is very busy.No probs talking to Mr Joseph but how? He is no more in the school..I dun mind crying in front of him.. did that so many times before and he really helped me..... Mr Kamal? I never want him to see me cry if I want to talk face to face..Paisey nia.....All this time I talked all my prob to him on the phone..exting of course..who would dare to call a teacher? Well in case of emergency of course... I did last time.... Now what? What am i gonna do?

If I told my friends,they won't give advices,thet will just tell me just forget about it..They are immature like me too... So .. what the hell am i gonna do now???????

Signing off,
Hayashi

Whaddup ?!


Hey guys .. Long time never update huh ?
Yeaahs .. sorry !! No time liao .. Huhu .. See lah .. Kapoku injured .. got one wound you know .. huhu .. Hahah .. so funny to name my guitar ..so bored .. searching for ABPBH 2009 full vid but still cannot find !!! So difficult leyh !!Hmm .. currently over Remy Ishak and Scorpions (especially favourite composer and guitarist RUDOLF SCHENKER !!) and composing a song .. Have got two songs , " Why are they killing me" and "Dear friends" but not going to publish it .. hehe .. my new song its either gonna be "No perfect guy" or "Another chance" hehe .. just wait !!

REMY ISHAK

RUDOLF SCHENKER

SCORPIONS

REMY ISHAK

Signing off,

Hayashi :P